Contentment

How can this picture not evoke some contented emotion in the person who views it? I can stare at it all day. I have never seen such colors so vibrant - like they are popping out in all their brilliance. This, of course, was taken when the sun was setting over Linekin Bay in quiet East Boothbay Harbor, Maine. The sunsets are absolutely incredible (see below, as I have posted some of the magnificent sunsets from our trip)! Although I do not read horoscopes, as the Church forbids it, I do know we all are born under certain astrological signs according to the way the sky and stars have alined on the day of our birth. Even the Wiseman read and followed the skies as they traveled to meet the King of Kings, an infant born in a manager. St. Matthew 2:1-2, "Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Juda, in the days of king Herod, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem. Saying: Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and we are come to adore him.
I was born under the sign of Scorpio; born October 23, 1968 - exactly one month to the day that one of my favorite Saints died, St. Padre Pio (September 23, 1968). I missed one month being alive at the same time he graced the earth. Getting back to our astrological signs: Scorpio:
Scorpios are fiercely independent. They are able to accomplish anything they put their mind to and they won't give up. They are perfectly suited to being on their own. They are not social butterflies like some other zodiac signs and some actually prefer to live on their own that way there is never any issue of who controls what at home, they like to be in control. Scorpios are extremely ambitious, persistent and determined which is shown through a power hungry, controlling attitude. Not in a stubborn sense however, because a Scorpio will work for what they want and control will justified reasons. This is obvious to any onlooker. A Scorpio never gives up, they are so determined to reach their goal. The key to this success is their flexibility. They are able to re-survey a situation and take a different approach if necessary. This makes them very adaptable and versatile.
Now given this description - I have to say it is spot on and extremely accurate. This is just the temperament of my astrological sign. Of the four personality temperaments I fall under - and this will come as NO surprise - Choleric/Melancholy mix.
{a Choleric} He sees only one road, the one he in his impetuosity has taken without sufficient consideration, and he does not notice that by another road he could reach his goal more easily. If great obstacles meet him he, because of his pride, can hardly make up his mind to turn back, but instead he continues with great obstinacy on the original course. He dashes his head against the wall rather than take notice of the door which is right near and wide open. By this imprudence the choleric wastes a great deal of his energy which could be used to better advantage, and he disgusts his friends, so that finally he stands almost alone and is disliked by most people. He deprives himself of his best successes, even though he will not admit that he himself is the main cause of his failures. He shows the same imprudence in selecting the means for the pursuit of perfection, so that in spite of great efforts he does not acquire it. The choleric can safeguard himself from this danger only by willing and humble submission to a spiritual director.
I have been trying to seek true contentment in my heart lately. The housing market is in the tank, with no immediate relief in sight. Most folks owe more on their homes than it is actually worth at this moment. Jobs are scarce. Oil prices keep rising, food costs are rising. It's all a very dreary outlook. I have this dream and I have this goal and my heart doesn't feel settled and probably will not feel settled until that goal is reached. My soul doesn't belong here. My soul connects with the beauty of the above (and below) sunsets, with the sea - the ebb and flow of the tides. I feel trapped in a foreign land right now, even though this is the place of my birth. I know there is beauty to be had if I look close enough and I pray it will be enough for me.
Each day my prayer has been, "Lord help me to be content with what You have given me." He has, indeed, blessed us greatly. This is not to say we aren't struggling like everyone else, but we have a home, food in our stomachs each day, land and health; but yet....my soul still goes to that place where the colors are alive and real, like something from a painting. Stuffing frustrations down deep takes much energy and that is what I have to do...for now. I long for a quieter, peaceful, simpler way of life. Do I need to go to it or does it come to me? It's a constant daily battle. Much of my youth was spent witnessing volatile situations so escapism is naturally part of my makeup, but I feel other personality characteristics play a large part in my searching for true peace. I don't think I will ever figure myself out, though I have a large chunk of it processed so far. I suppose with so many years of strife and upheaval it is only natural as one approaches the middle portion of their life to say, "This is what I want. This is what I need." I pray what I want and what I need is God's wants and needs for me.