Hope has two beautiful daughters. Their names are anger and courage; anger at the way things are, and courage to see that they do not remain the way they are.
~ Augustine of Hippo ~
These past few months have been quite a whirlwind of activity! We inch ever closer to our move to Massachusetts and excitement is mounting for all of us. We have been praying very hard that all the pieces come together for all parties involved. We especially need our house to sell and it seems rather bleak at times with only two showings in as many months or more. Fortunately, we have kind and generous friends who are renting us their home as they are looking to down size. We did, however, try to find a rental on our own and it seems all the doors were closed to us; either the issues was a family with six children or a family with a German Shepherd. I know here in NJ we need a special rider on the house for our home owners policy because we own a German Shepherd. At any rate, all said no. Our friends and my husband and I sat together to talk about renting their home as they would like to downsize theirs. So the cards in the air are thus:
1. We need to sell our NJ home, hopefully before the fall so that we aren't carrying a mortgage and a rental payment. Today is the 9th day of my novena to my friend in heaven, St. Padre Pio. I literally just received a phone call for another showing this week. I know Padre Pio has God's ear and he will be our intercessor for this move.
2. Our friends need to find the perfect home for their family.
3. My husband needs to find employment in Massachusetts and in this economy the prospects are not good, though we continue to have faith. We do not want to be without him for long (at all really!).
So what have we accomplished? Well we have our storage bin on the property, which is filling up fast. We try to get boxes done weekly. My three older children have had their placement testing at the school and all were accepted. My two Kindergartners have had their orientation at their new school and their registrations put in. The van is now registered in Massachusetts with new plates and registration, insurance and license. We have made several trips north for one reason or another. I took the train one time; thinking I was going up to sign a lease on a beautiful Victorian only to find out once I got up there that the owner changed his mind. Said his "septic wasn't big enough for our family" even though the home was a four bedroom. We must believe that God had a reason for this.
I did, however, thoroughly enjoy riding up to Boston on a train. It was quite an experience. Now I have always been a "traveler" if you will. I never really felt settled in one place. I lived in many states and bounced around. Never thought anything of hopping in my car and moving to Queens, NY not knowing a soul and just running with it. But now, after being a recluse of sorts - raising my family and making only local trips out to the grocery store etc...I must admit I was a bit nervous. My wonderful younger brother dropped me off at 30th street station in the wee hours of the morning. Thankfully I was able to get some caffeine and watch the ticker board until my train popped up. Found a seat and began my trip north. It was actually relaxing! I was right behind the snack car so that helped. My anxiety came in when we arrived in Boston. I had to catch the Silver Line from the train station to the airport, as there are no rental car locations at the train station. Found the silver line, got my ticket and off we went to the airport. At the airport I had to find the shuttle to the rental car company. Arrived safely there then had to maneuver my way out of the city of Boston, which I loved immediately, by the way (never been there!) and then off to our friend's home. The trip back on the train was just as great because this time I sat in the "quiet car" for six hours, which also happened to be next to the snack car :) It was like sitting in a library for six hours. When does a mother of six every get six complete hours of silence?
We made another trip back up last week for the little boys school orientation. It's a neat little school. I immediately loved the principal and the staff. I love the fact that the school is only K-2. I don't have to worry about older kids picking on the little ones. I must say, I have homeschooled now for nine years. I have been on loops and groups and have listened to many different "opinions" on the public school. It has been driven into me that putting a child in the "system" is like buying them a pass to the entrance of hell itself. It seems from my perspective that so many conservative folks are more afraid of what is "out there" then what the reality actually is. I must admit, we are not choosing public except for Kindergarten and possibly first grade because we love the Catholic school our children will all be attending, but I am finding my fear of what is "out there" is becoming more minimal the more I step out and test the waters. I believe fear is a big factor in what drives many of the more conservative circles. Yes, we do hear a lot of horrible horror stories out there, but it's not rampant and pandemic in every school. I feel like if proper thought and prayer and meditation goes into a family's decision for school education that Our Lord will bless that decision. If it's not meant to be one will know simply because the doors will all close.
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.
Mark Twain
I never realized how long I have lived in fear. There were times, admittedly, I was caught up in protecting the ones I love - sheltering them and for good and holy reasons, but sometimes to the extreme. I like the above quote by Mark Twain. I hope to "master my fear" and enter into this new world with courage and trust and faith in God and his blessings. It will all be new and exciting, though I don't move forward with blinders for I know, as my friend Barb says, "the honeymoon period will at some point wear off." I will, however, enjoy the honeymoon period for as long as it lasts.
